


Double Trouble

by Melalucci



Category: The Guardian (US TV), The Mentalist
Genre: Crossover, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-09
Updated: 2013-07-09
Packaged: 2017-12-18 04:58:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/875868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Melalucci/pseuds/Melalucci
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One Patrick Jane is bad enough.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Double Trouble

Teresa Lisbon jerked back, almost stumbling over her own feet to make sure her eyes weren't deceiving her. "What the hell?" she muttered, watching Rigsby and Cho walk a pitiful-looking Patrick Jane into the first interrogation room. In handcuffs.

She strode quickly down the hall, putting her hands on her hips as soon as she reached the doorway. "What have you done now?" she demanded, eyes boring straight into Patrick.

He sat up warily, rubbing his just de-cuffed wrists. "I'm invoking my right to remain silent," he mumbled.

Teresa's eyes widened. "Are you _kidding_ me?"

"I thought for sure he'd give it up when we got him to you," Rigsby said, bewildered.

Teresa shook her head, stalking closer to stand in front of Patrick, crossing her arms. "When did you get a haircut?" Obviously, this was some kind of misguided prank. She looked back at her detectives. "What'd he do?"

"He was buying drugs," Cho answered, bewildered. "From James Caro."

Teresa blinked. "The _kingpin_?" She shoved Patrick's shoulder. "What were you thinking?!"

Patrick narrowed his eyes. "I'm not going to say anything, so you can give up the 'bad cop' routine. I want to make a phone call."

Delighted laughter erupted from the doorway, where Patrick Jane -- wait -- was standing, clapping his hands.

The three detectives turned, looking shocked and confused.

Patrick widened his eyes. "Don't stop! I want to see you do 'bad cop,' Lisbon!" He smiled dazzlingly at her.

Teresa crossed to him. "Did you set this up?"

"Set what up?" Patrick peered around her, then tilted his head. "Oh. Hello." He walked slowly over to the table, studying the man sitting there as if he were a science project.

The other man (obviously not Patrick, now that everyone could see the real thing -- this other guy looked sullen, he was wearing a tie, his hair was flat, and he was a few years younger) blinked repeatedly, then reached up to rub his eyes.

"Wow," Patrick said softly. "Like looking in a mirror...if I was a stuffed-shirt lawyer." He laughed, dropping into the chair across from his lookalike.

"How do you know he's a lawyer?" Cho asked, taking a step closer. Rigsby and Teresa did, too, everyone forming a fascinated half-circle around Patrick's side of the table.

Patrick gestured. "Oh, it's obvious. Expensive suit, air of entitlement, his posture. Practically oozing out of his pores."

The other man glared at him. "I don't have an air of entitlement." He shifted, scooting closer to the table.

"Is he your brother?" Rigsby asked Patrick, looking like a lost puppy. "You told us you were an only child."

Patrick stroked his chin, not taking his eyes off the other man. "I am," he said, then paused. "As far as I know."

"I'm not his brother," the other man said, sighing.

"Check his pockets," Teresa said with a nod to Cho. There had been no need when they'd thought it was Patrick, but now...

"Hey!" the man snapped, but Cho was all business, extracting a fancy wallet from a front pocket and flipping it open.

"Says his name is Nick Fallin," he said, showing everyone the I.D. within. He flipped through the credit cards, then half-grinned as he pulled out a stack of business cards. "Corporate lawyer. Works with his pop."

Patrick tilted his head. "That's not all you do, though," he said thoughtfully.

Teresa pulled another chair up to the table and sat beside him. "Let us help you," she told Nick. "Tell us how you came to be found buying drugs from a hugely well-known scumbag."

"You don't want to help me," Nick said warily, but he looked defeated.

"You look like me," Patrick replied cheerfully. "That gives you points right there." He nudged Teresa playfully with an elbow and winked.

She swatted him away, trying not to smile.

**Author's Note:**

> My mom asked for a story about Patrick Jane and Teresa Lisbon from "The Mentalist," and she chose the number 30, which is "Doppleganger Crossover." So here, Patrick and Teresa meet Nick Fallin, Simon Baker's character from "The Guardian"!
> 
> Written in twenty minutes, not edited.


End file.
